Friday, March 31, 2017

“Hopefully someone will show to keep me alive for another day.”

Taylor’s fight. Prince’s of Prophecy Book 6: Sniper
Dakota walks in while I’m sitting at the table. “Your guns Brother.”
“Thanks.” I don’t know what to say and look away from him. “Thanks for stepping in last night.” “The light of day makes everything look better. You will feel it soon.” He walks out and I replay that over and over. I hope he’s fuckin right. Looking at my guns I have some doubt. I think about calling Beth and telling her what a pussy I am, but throw it out. She doesn’t need me shooting her and she sure as fuck doesn’t need another dead man in her life. She deserves to be happy. She deserves everything and I can’t even tell her I’ll be there for her tomorrow. I drop my cup in the dishwasher and get to work. Darren is at the door waiting for me to dismiss my first class. When the last Brother is out he closes the door.
“Prez called me. He wants you to know that even if it’s through other people he’s not letting go.” Jesus. I look away.
“With a message like that I think I need to be right here letting you know I am too.” “Thanks VP.”
“No. Darren. You’re one of my closest Brothers. We grew up together. I’m Darren your friend, your family. Talk to me Brother.” I sit in the closest chair to me putting my head in my hands.
“What’s to say? The fuckin nights of hell are worse. Dakota showed taking my guns last night. Apparently I wouldn’t have made it. I don’t even know when it’s happening.” He sits on the side of me.
“Fuck that’s bad Taylor. We can stay with you. We’ll alternate nights.” I laugh. Fuckin great. “Death watch isn’t my style Brother.”
“From the looks of you – drinking isn’t either. If what’s happening right now isn’t working we need to come up with something that does. I’m willing to give you whatever you need to get there.” It all sounds so good but what the fuck kind of life is this? “I don’t know what the fuck I need but thanks.”
“What happened to your girl?” he asks standing up. Fuck.
“To avoid killing her in the middle of the night I’m staying the fuck away.” He looks at me. “That’s not a good thought but she means something to you. I’d guess the same can be said for her. Did you tell her what’s happening?” I look away.
“No. she lost her husband in the war.”
“Fuck that’s a fuckin blow to take. You need to talk to her even if it’s just asking for some time to get this shit straight.” I shake my head. “I can’t even tell her how much time. What the fuck do I say? Hopefully someone will show to keep me alive for another day. She deserves to be happy and I’ve got no future to give her.”
“I’ll talk to Prez. Talk to your girl. We’ll figure out a way to get through this and you to make that future.” Whatever. I throw him chin.

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